Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
