Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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