You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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