it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
