I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize