I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize
