im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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