I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Randomize
