Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
