Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize