you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
