I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
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