So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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