I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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