Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
