How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
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