doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
