I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
