Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Randomize
