I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Randomize
