I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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