i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize
