he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize