Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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