So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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