You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Dear god my vagina.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
