YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
