Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Randomize
