I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
