somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
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