Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
