Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
