Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
