i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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