you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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