Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
We named our party play list daddy issues
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
