Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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