I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
