nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
God gave him joint rollers for hands
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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