i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
