is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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