found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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