do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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