Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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