I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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