i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
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