I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
