why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
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