Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
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