what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
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