He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize
